Korean Lessons ᚛ Level 7 - Upper-Intermediate Korean #2 (Lessons 181 to 210) ᚛ Lesson 193 - Regret in Korean [-(으)ㄹ걸 그랬다] [-았/었어야 했는데]
Regret in Korean [-(으)ㄹ걸 그랬다] [-았/었어야 했는데]
To express regret, English says "I should have" or "I would have been better off". Korean has two structures that match these two nuances: -았/었어야 했는데, which regrets not having fulfilled an obligation, and -(으)ㄹ걸 그랬다, which regrets a choice and says that we would have done better to act otherwise. We will look at each of them, then at what sets them apart.
"I should have": regret with -았/었어야 했는데
In the lesson on "to have to", we saw the -아/어야 하다 structure. To say that we should have done something, we simply put the first verb in the past tense:
[Verb conjugated in the past tense casual style]야 하다
The literal translation is "it was necessary that I…": the obligation existed, and it was not fulfilled. In the vast majority of cases, the sentence ends with -았/었어야 했는데 (or -았/었어야 하는데, if the regret is felt in the present): the -는데 ending leaves the sentence hanging, and it is this suspension that expresses the regret, exactly like an "I should have…" said with a sigh. The sentence can stop there or go on with what happened instead. -았/었어야 했어요 and -았/었어야 했습니다 are also found.
어제 부모님 집에 들렀어야 하는데 깜빡하고 그냥 집으로 왔어요.
→ I should have stopped by my parents’ place yesterday, but I forgot and just went straight home.
그때 주식이 많이 올랐을 때 팔았어야 했는데. 지금은 너무 늦어 버렸네.
→ I should have sold when the stock was at its highest. Now it is far too late.
어제 저녁에 빨리 잤어야 했는데 영화 보고 노느라 너무 늦게 자서 결국 아침에 지각하고 말았어.
→ I should have gone to bed early last night, but I stayed up very late watching a movie and ended up being late this morning.
네 말을 들었어야 하는데, 그때는 내가 철이 없었어.
→ I should have listened to you, but back then I was immature.
내가 일찍 집에 가지 말고 끝까지 진우 옆에 남아서 같이 있어 줬어야 했는데.
→ I should not have gone home early, I should have stayed by Jinwoo’s side until the end.
한국에 오기 전에 미리 공부했어야 했는데, 무슨 말인지 하나도 못 알아듣겠어.
→ I should have studied before coming to Korea: I cannot understand a single word.
To regret having done something, we use the negative form -지 말았어야 했는데, "I should not have":
그 비밀만큼은 끝까지 아무에게도 말하지 말았어야 했는데. 너무 후회돼요.
→ That secret, I should never have told it to anyone. I regret it so much.
다시는 헤어진 남자친구에게 전화하지 말았어야 했는데 어제 또 술김에 전화해 버렸어요.
→ I should never have called my ex again, but yesterday, under the influence, I ended up calling him once more.
"I should have just": regret with -(으)ㄹ걸 그랬다
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Differences between -았/었어야 했는데 and -(으)ㄹ걸 그랬다
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Exercises
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